Krampus is coming. Do not bother running. Do not bother hiding, and don’t bother deleting your internet history. Rest assured that Krampus knows everything you’ve done, and there is nothing you can do about it. Don’t believe me? Read the stories featured in Deadman’s Tome Krampus Christmas to get an idea of what’s in store for you and any and every deplorable friend you know. The Night Before Krampus illustrates that it may take less than you think to receive a special visit. The Present serves as a warning to avoid any and all suspicious gifts. Snowman Town shows that Krampus can manifest in different forms. Santa’s Bag delivers a sliver of hope, of redemption, because Krampus is a man of his word. Sugarplums and Other Carrion is a chilling and sinister tale of disappearing children that shows just how wicked the Krampus curse can be. The Plasticization of Christmas wraps up with a tale that reminds you that no one in your family is spared when you’re a family of deplorable, debaucherous characters ripe for a Jerry Springer episode.
“People love me. And you know what, I have been very successful. Everybody loves me.” – Donald Trump
People love you, alright. But not in the way you think, Mr. Get-Rich-Off-Of-Daddy’s-Tit. People love to mock you. People love to shower you with disrespect. If it was an option, people would drop a steaming pile of sloppy feces on your name. When you pass away, people would line up just to piss on your grave. But that wouldn’t matter to you, would it? The golden showers would come at a price, and boy would people fork over the cash. Regardless, you are the president of the United States of America, and I will raise a glass to you and give you that much. I’’ call you President, but with it comes a whole nasty serving of unadulterated ridicule. This issue of Deadman’s Tome is all about you, Mr. Trump. Dark, twisted, satirical tales at your expense, plus with a interview you had with me that you may not recall. I hope you enjoy.
I do not believe in trigger warnings or safe spaces. The idea that I would have to warn adults that they’re about to read adult material and that the subject matter might be, gosh, too “adult” for them is pathetic. With that said, No Safe Word might just be the most deplored and debaucherous piece of filth Deadman’s Tome has ever released. No Safe Word is a smooth blend of horrific perversions, hardcore erotica, and the brutal imagery that Deadman’s Tome is known for. With a title like No Safe Word, it should be of no surprise that this issue contains strong images of misogyny, misandry, BDSM, brutal beatings, and demonic sex. If you cannot stomach that, then please, do not go any further.
This collection of dark, Lovecraftian horror contains stories that would hopefully please Cthulhu and the rest of The Ancient Ones. This issue of Deadman’s Tome starts off with Roofwork by Raven McAllister. A slow burn that reads as if it was a long lost work of H. P. Lovecraft recently discovered. Roofwork is followed by The Darkness from the Ground by S. Alessandro Martinez, a balanced blend of Cthulhu cultist and slasher horror. The Tongue of the Ocean by Stanley B. Webb explores the ocean depths for a thing that should not be. A strange dark infestation thrives in the dorms of cursed university in HELL BEYOND EARTH by Jared Kane. A serial killer becomes the prey of an abhorrent monstrosity in The Shambler by Philip Kleaver. Slow No Wake by Jeff C. Stevenson probes into the bizarre sighting of tentacles near the North Carolina Intracoastal Waterway. Under Other Gods by Wallace Boothill explores parallel universes to discover unfathomable horrors. Bury Me Not on the Lonesome Prairie by C. S. Anderson frames a Lovecraft Old Ones story in the Old West with a showdown between gunslingers and Shoggoth. A traveler discovers an ancient journal that tells of ungodly cultist horror during the dark ages in The Tomb in the Sands by Jeff Robertson. The collection closes with War Crimes by M.R. Wallace, a tale that reminds us that even modern military is no match to the powers and influence of The Ancient Ones.
He’s returned, but not to save…
Deadman’s Tome He’s Risen is an irreverent collection of blasphemous horror dedicated to the king of kings! This sinister issue frames the Resurrection in a way that most horror readers would enjoy, especially zombie fans. From Jesus returning to feast on the living to Jesus kicking undead ass, He’s Risen features unadulterated content that entertains and disturbs. Enjoy.
Check out a preview of Kelly Evans’ Mortecarni
March to the Grave is a very grim look at the horrors of war. Red Roses and White Flags delves deep into PTSD delirium. No Man’s Land follows a fatally wounded soldier and tells of the importance of brotherhood. A Light Just Out of Range explores the chaotic and deplorable conditions of trench warfare. They Can Never Find Out might evoke empathy for a NAZI paranormal team. Guilt weighs heavy in The Blue Light as a wounded marine is haunted by the death of a child on the battlefield. Across The White Desert puts a small team against an unknown evil. Aftermath, the last story in this issue, is a clever parallel that I think would resonate with most veterans.
From the time we are young, we fear the monster under the bed or in the closet, making it impossible to sleep without a nightlight. Then, we hear stories of Bigfoot, and maybe even the Mothman around campfires. When we are adults, we wonder if there might actually be supernatural creatures lurking in the shadows. Are these tall tales and urban legends only metaphors for what horrific things humanity is capable of—or do monsters exist?
Go to some terrifying places with this cast of authors. You will be dragged into mystifying realities where demonic fairies hide, where devil monkeys lure carnival-goers to their demise, where Goatmen seek to destroy their prey, and where the goddess of death puts out a hit on victims of her choice. These shocking tales will have you biting your nails and locating that childhood nightlight. Because, in the end, we all know monsters do exist.