The Taylor Swift and Kanye West Crap Story

(Characters are completely fictional. This is a work of parody and satire.)

Taylor Swift doubled over as she raced to the bathroom. Her stomach churned. A sharp pain pulsated within her abdomen, while her sphincter was one wrong move away from opening like a backed up dam. With the toilet in sight, her fingers fumbled with her belt buckle. The motion caused her asshole to pucker against her undies with a wet kiss. Taylor Swift squirmed and hurried, gritting teeth as brown water trickled down her leg. Dropping her pants, she sat her ass on cold ivory and sighed in relief as a waterfall of shit flowed through her. She held on to her thighs, and gave a little prayer, as her chocolate starfish wept.
While her turdpipe dumped gallons of butt juice similar to how Harvey dumped on Houston, all she could think about was that burrito. That fucking goddamn burrito! A mega burrito purchased from a taco truck parked out in the middle of nowhere, and of course she had to ask for extra jalapenos.
Rocking back and forth, she felt the mexplosion go from mild to hot, while her poop chute sang soprano. Sweat dripped from Taylor Swift’s brow. Teeth clamped shut while she seethed. Her fingernails dug into flesh. Her heart pounded, but the shit ride just wouldn’t stop.

Taylor Swift felt a warm wetness wafting from below and looked down to find her body’s recreation of mexican bean dip getting closer. A frantic flush sucked the burrito shlits down an inch only to rise like a shit tide at shit noon. Brown latte overflowed from the toilet, while Taylor Swift quivered in absolute disgust. She tried to stand, but lost her footing and fell into deuce juice, all the while a shit gusher sprayed from her ass.
“Help,” she cried, bitter tasting ass gravy splashing her lips as she crawled towards the door. “I can’t stop shitting.”
Clutching the sink, Taylor Swift pulled herself up.
“Sweety,” she said, glancing into a mirror where a brown Al Joleson stared back, mortified. “I think I’m dying.”
A sudden torrent of sphincter chocolate exploded with enough force to slam her against the door. Lost to an awesome buttgasm, she quivered as her limp body collapsed to the floor.
The door cracked open.
“You’re stinking up the whole house.” Kanye West said, before gagging and covering his nose. “Jesus fucking Christ. I hope you’re not expecting me to clean up this shit!”
Taylor Swift, slick with layers upon layers of shit, looked up at her lover. “It won’t stop. My ass, it’s like broken or something.”

(to be continued…)

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